How to Ensure You Stay Safe and Steer Clear of Bad Apples When Dating Online

Online dating is a fun and effective way of meeting people for friendship, dating and love in the real world. Exchanging emails is a great way to build deep relationships. However, you have to know how to be safe online too. You don’t want to expose yourself to risky situations and not-so-well intentioned people on the web. You wouldn't give a stranger on the street your name, address and telephone number…so don't do it on-line! Protect yourself with the following guidelines.

Keep Your Personal Details Private

It is important that you remain anonymous in your early online communications with a person. Don’t give out your real email address, last name, phone number, address or place of work during your early correspondence. If a person places pressure on you to give this information do not give it out. If they are persistent or pesky stop all communications with them. It’s best not to give out this information at all unless you have met with them (preferably more than once) and are satisfied that it is safe to do so.

If possible check with your ISP and check that your online profile does not give out more personal information than you are comfortable with.

You can keep your email address anonymous with email redirection services like Bigfoot or you can also just sign up for a separate email account to your main one and just use that exclusively for dating and other things you wish to remain anonymous for (obviously don’t use you real name in the email address). Also be careful that any email signatures that you have do not give out personal details like your place of work, phone number, address or full name.

Trust your Intuition
99% of people on line have the best of intentions but in order to keep that lousy 1% at bay follow these tips - If your online correspondent doesn't answer questions directly, lies, deliberately misleads you or just gives off a bad vibe, trust your better instincts and get rid of them fast. Better to find someone you can trust. Don't waste time trying to get the truth from them or argue with them. If they are dishonest that early in the game, just know they are going to give you nothing but grief. Drop correspondence with them and move on. You can’t build a relationship on lies or manipulation and if they are lying than they are the ones most likely to have any kinds of less honorable intentions in their relationship to you.

Verifying Who They Are
If you feel the need to, you can ask for references from your online friends - work, friends and family before you meet in the real world. Honest people will have no objection to this request, and will appreciate that you are playing it smart and safe.

You can also verify their place of employment. For example, if they tell you they are a lawyer, you can ask for cases they have worked on or people they know in the industry. If you are unable to verify any details about your online buddy, trust your better judgment and move on.

Background Checks
There are actually services these days where you can pay to check a persons background details. These are things like deeds, bankruptcy, criminal history, marital information and more.

If you’re unsure that your online buddy is the person they say they are then you can go ahead and use these types of services to make sure. There are plenty of these companies around now and if you do a quick search on Google it will turn up a heap of results

Meeting in Person
Don't allow yourself to be pressured into meeting a person before you are ready. If they are pushy about it in a way that is uncomfortable, or seems odd then its best to stop all contact with the person.

When you do decide to meet someone whose company you enjoy online, make sure you meet in a public place and if you like you can even bring your friends or organize for your friend to be nearby to keep an eye on you. Your online buddy will understand and accommodate your wishes if they are honest about their intentions towards you. If during the date, you decide to go somewhere else, use your own car and try to stay in public places until you feel you know the person very well (usually after at least a few dates)

Don't go on dates in remote areas or in either of your homes until you know the person very well. A short initial meeting is always good. If, on meeting, you know you won't be seeing this person again, sharing coffee and a little polite chat won't be as painful as spending a long day together. (You’ll thank us for this tip if you’re ever in this situation)

Tell your friends and family where you are going, with whom, and arrange to call them after your date. If you travel to meet your on-line pal, make your own hotel and car reservations and don't give out the name of your hotel. Get your own transport to and from the date even if you’re offered a lift.

Getting out of Trouble
If you start feeling uncomfortable about your date, politely from excuse yourself from the situation. Excuse yourself and leave by the back door if necessary. Do not hesitate to ask for help from persons nearby, call your family, friends or the police if you feel the situation warrants. Trust your judgment and don't be afraid of potential embarrassment. Better to be embarrassed than physically hurt or intimidated.

Better to be Safe than Sorry
My mother always used to tell me, it is better to be safe than sorry and I think she has a good point. Although chances are that you will never come across anyone with dishonest or ill intentions online it’s better to take these precautions anyway just so you always feel safe and happy with your online dating experiences. Happy dating!